Demian

 

So recently I finished the first book I have read in a while. I picked this book back up in August before college started, and I only started reading it after Thanksgiving. The book is called Demian by Herman Hesse. At first I got the book because I wanted to get more into philosophy, and for some reason it was recommended to me over some other works. I have no clue why as Hesse is not your traditional philosopher but I guess you could say he kind of is. Anyways, I took up Google’s advice and I got the book. Before then I read Among the Thugs, which was so good. Thank you to my boss Eugene Rabkin for recommending that book in our talk about Premier League soccer. It was maybe one of the most memorable moments of my life. I’m getting sidetracked, but the point is when I read this book, my whole life took a turn. As I was reading it I was kind of not in a good place mentally, which is part of the reason it took me so long to read, but also I connected better with the character. Emil Sinclaire, the boy who is somewhat of an outcast, trying to make his parents happy but also having no friends. A bit of attachment issues as well. This character, trying to find himself in a world where he feels misunderstood, one day he meets Max Demian. A new boy, whose mother is a widow. The boy with a feminine face, but also manly as well. A boy who is filled to the brim with knowledge, well spoken, stern, and witty. The type of person you would normally want to stay away from in that time period. As he was not Christian like the rest of the people in the German town Emil Sinclaire was from. This boy Demian was the shifting point of Emil’s life. He solved Emil’s issues with a bully he had a quarrel with in the frontmost of the book. He then wooed the heart of Emil into thinking differently about the story of Cain and Abel. The story where if you are Christian you do not think otherwise. Demian changed Emil’s thoughts. He showed Emil that there are other ways of thinking. After this the story goes on, Emil and Demian go back and forth to and from each other. But in the back of his mind, Emil is always thinking of Demian. The book goes on after this and it becomes one of the best reads I have had in so long. I think it is my favorite book of all time. It changed my perception on a lot of things. It made me get back into classical music with the reference of Buxtehude that the character Pistorius plays by his lonesome while Emil listens from outside. Eventually leading to a friendship between the god Abraxas that Demian also taught Emil about. This story was very influential to me. I understood a lot of it. I felt like I learned a lot too. I learned more about myself, I think I became a kinder person while reading this story. I also feel like I am now going down a rabbit hole of Hesse’s books as I am now reading Steppenwolf which is also really good. There has not been a bad moment in these short story books.

I really just wanted to talk about this book as I find it extremely fulfilling. The themes, characters, language, everything in this novel changed my outlook on life. It helped me get through some stuff in my life as well. Coming out of reading I think I became a different person. I now have a greater appreciation for things, and I realize that some things are not meant to be. I also realize that in times of hardship there are still things to look forward to.

Also coming off of this I just finished Steppenwolf as well. I have to say that it was not as good as Demian, but it still did seem very similar to Demian. The main character both had a liking for androgynous people, and both enjoyed the same type of music as well. Both stories were a good read for me. The ending was really rushed though. The ending had no build up. It just happened. Boom. It didn’t feel like the Steppenwolf really felt something either. He just accepted it. It also started to become less of his recounting, and more of a story. The first person in the book found Steppenwolf's words. There was no conclusion to the story, no like, “I am leaving these notes here.” or, “I am going to now move on with my life or finally take the razor and turn it on myself.” Nothing of that sort. So in that department I found it lacking, and needed a lot more clarification. Other than that, it's a good book. Time to read Siddartha.